Oh exes, how you plague thee. For anyone who has had to deal with a break up, comes the bi-product of the EX. What do you do with that? How do you get over it? Well here are top 5 tips that I think can help you along the way. I need to preface this with the idea that there isn’t a real timeline for these things. Oddly, sometimes, many of these things are experienced while still in the relationship. But here they are:
- Mourn the relationship – When a relationship of that gravity ends, you need time to heal. And this doesn’t mean sit in a dark room and cry about it. It might, but it doesn’t have to be. This means seeking within, take time to remensce and understand taht while things usually end on a bittersweet note, there were very good things that I’m sure came out of it. So cry, but smile, and laugh throughout the reflection.
- Healthy Distractions – Relationships take a huge chunk out of your social calendar. So when they’re dunzo, one of the best things to do is to just fill up your free time with some new things. Join a sports team, or hit up more days at the gym! Do things that make you smile and make you feel accomplished and active. The key to this tip is HEALTHY. Many people fall into a sinkhole of sadness. But the best way to curb this is to do something that will benefit you, not set you back.
- Take Time for You – Another thing you lose when you’re in a relationship is a bit of self-identity. So now that it’s over, take some time to take back some things you want to do for yourself. No boyfriend? Go on that trip anyway! No man on your arm? Take all the individual baths you desire! Spend all that extra cash on clothes for your fine ass instead of his broke one.
- Get Yourself Out There – Like I prefaced, everything in good time. But, one thing I have experienced is when a relationship ends, you start to feel unloved and unlovable. Nothing like a little attention seeking to quell those dark thoughts. Too soon? Meh. Live in the present. Why spend time sulking when you can spend time getting heart emojis and/or free drinks from doting strangers 😛
- Don’t Be So Hard On You – This one is a toughie. When relationships end, it’s easy to be hard on yourself for it ending. It always takes two to tango, and at the end of the day, things start, and things end. It’s just the way of life and it changes from person to person. Don’t get yourself down with the guilt of the relationship being over. Heads up buttercup, you will be fine.
Finally, I will leave you with a recent podcast where I sit down with my good friend to chat about what happens when you break up with someone. We both tell our stories of love, loss, and heartbreak and ask the question, can you really be friends with your ex?
What have your experiences been with your exes? Sound off in the comments below!